Two pints of wine and a packet of crisps… #ComeOnKevin, tell us all about this fabulous Brexit bonus!

Pint bottles. Photo by Unisouth, Wikimedia Commons

Article contains strong language, reflecting the author’s frustration!

The government is casting around in desperation for some kind of ‘Brexit benefit’. Today, it came up with this little gem:

Fortunately, our favourite wine importer and industry commentator, Daniel Lambert, was ready to explain what this actually means for the wine trade. No punches were pulled… Over to you, Daniel!

Ok, folks, I am being asked about this and so let me cut to the chase: it’s absolute bollocks. Why people can’t use their brain is beyond me. Let’s take a step back and think about the supply side.’

Currently wineries around the globe all use 75cl bottles; yes, every single wine producing nation on the planet is running with 75cl bottles – that’s literally billions of bottles. Even the UK!

So why does an out-of-touch (corrupt and incompetent) government think that the wine producers around the world – who have zero need to change bottle size – would do that, let alone all the costs involved.

It’s pure bollocks based on some sad little Tory f*ckwit who clearly understands Brexit has delivered f*ck all so has come up with drivel to keep the brain-dead Brexit types engaged.

Then the media pick up on it because nothing else has happened over Xmas so they need to talk shit about something. That’s the UK media and government in a nutshell. Talk shite in the hope people will believe you whilst being distracted from what’s actually going on…

What actually going on is the Home Secretary has drugged his wife, the PM wants to be Hugh Grant and essential workers should be grateful for half a mince pie. As for the rest of the world…

Someone asked if the stuff imported in tanks and bottled in Avonmouth might end up in pints bottles to give the Tories a Brexit win…

‘I doubt it. You need a new bottling line, new tooling, labels, and customers willing to buy it. None of which exist!’

Daniel tweeted Kevin Hollinrake MP, Minister for Business (yes…really…), asking him:

‘Hey, Kevin, why are you making stuff up? Really I would be keen to know seeing as I’m an actual wine wholesaler…or don’t you engage with real life business people? Keen to hear back…’

The MP replied:

‘Hi Daniel, making what up?’

Daniel:

‘You seem to think this is actually going to happen and that people will be able to buy this wine bottle size that doesn’t exist anywhere. So you’re making this stuff up. It’s pure fantasy. Happy to debate this on James O’Brien’s [radio show] if you want. Have you got the balls?’

James O’Brien said he’d be up for hosting the session after January 2, but Hollinrake has gone quiet.

So now #ComeOnKevin is trending on Twitter…

Meanwhile, Daniel has been on BBC Radio Wales:

It’s funny…except it really isn’t. A government in permanent dead-cat-flinging mode is exponentially worse than no government at all, because it’s a government that has to distract from the many crimes and calumnies it is perpetrating.

We cannot afford this government a day longer. We cannot tolerate its lies and corruption. Our democracy is now in a state of constant, persistent erosion. Our human rights are under attack. Poverty and inequality have exploded. Our institutions are undermined or underfunded or both. Our environment is a sh*tshow…literally. We are a laughing stock on the world stage.

Enough.

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Look out for news on the launch of more Primaries in January.